28 November 2001

Of giving and meaning

It's been an eventful month, to say the least.

A much loved pastor to many Malaysian Christians was taken home in a shocking accident. I know enough of him to know that it is a tremendous loss to many. And to me not to have known him. He has made his closing gift in a life of giving.

It reminds me to 'number my days aright' and to continue being 'poured on the altar of sacrifice'.
A man accused me (falsely) of denting his car and threatened to hurt us. Some accessories on my car has since been stolen.

I'm reminded not to be vindictive. After all, why steal from me when all I have is already a gift to the world?

The Psalms always capture the Israelites' unshakable sense of belonging and identity as the Lord's 'people and the sheep of His pasture' even in the worst of defeats. When they should have felt utterly abandoned.

Dire circumstances can only drive us deeper into His embrace.

With all the hype of the upcoming release of LOTR, I'm reading Tolkien afresh. He gives me many symbols to bind up truths.

Like when Frodo asked Tom Bombadil who are you? He answers, 'Don't you know my name yet? That's the only answer. Tell me, who are you, alone, yourself and nameless.'
Who am I, alone, myself and nameless?

I am defined by my relationship to the other. To God most of all. Sometimes there are moments of acute sense of aimlessness and search for meaning. I am nothing in and of myself.

I am real only in the worship of God. When He descends to dwell in me, and I am raised to dwell in Him. We glorify Him and He glorifies us. We are His inheritance, and He is our very great reward.

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