23 March 2002

Living on the edge

I'm a sucker for torture. This year was supposed to be the 'honeymoon' year of my 4-year Masters' program. But I couldn't handle the honeymooning. I was growing sedentary, a little retarded mentally and knew I had to do something before I grew pressure sores. So I enrolled for external exams.

'Are you nuts?' Most people would ask. 'You are really bizarre. People study for exams, you take exams to study!''

I am insane aren't I?

So here I am, a month exactly from doomsday, wondering if my head's screwed on right. I count the reality - one hundred topics and 29 days to go. The files and books are stacked ever higher, dwarfing my shrinking confidence. Laugh. I AM mad. But hey, what's life without a little dare and madness?

The correct term for this, I am told, is brinkmanship. I have cultivated (according to Merriam-Webster's dictionary) 'the practice of pushing a dangerous situation to the limit of safety to force a desired outcome.'

And what is my desired outcome? Passing the darned exams, certainly. But I hope this race does more for me than push through a self-imposed finish line. Sharper eyes, better hands, quicker thinking, and overall a better understanding of learning.

And a little excitement on the side.

Wish me luck, guys. And don't try this at home without clearance from your personal physician.